Star Wars For Single People

I'm tired like one of those early morning swimmers you see,
pushed by their parents to get bronze at an Olympics in 8 years from now.
I'm tired and my eyes itch from chlorine
and I've started holding automatic doors open for strangers in an attempt to look like a young Obi Wan,
because I'm that tired from these dark days I think I'm on Coruscant.

imagine living in an art gallery

like, 24/7, totally legit your home address
and it was never scary at night as it
always remained a constant level of
Saturday afternoon naps on a parents' shoulder sat down a lost art gallery corridor tired from too much art
and it never went dark and we'd never have to sleep
instead we'd be coming and going from those Saturday afternoon naps all the time,
waking up from the best sleep you've ever had into the best sleep you've ever had in real life
all the time.    

I Got 99 Problems and Scrapheap Challenge Is One of Them

My heaven,
my everyday, 9 to 5 after this big 9-5
would be me
in a chair
watching late night re-runs of Scrapheap challenge at half two in the morning.


what we are,
is a two way thing
without touching

When Time Team Found My Teeth

Why should I brush my teeth?
the Boy asked.

Because out of everything,
the dentist said, his wife agreed,
Out of everything they're the only thing
that'll remain, these and your bones,
so keep fit and drink your milk,
brush your teeth and don't smoke
because in 500 years’ time
Tony Robinson and his merry band of rag tag professionals will come along and dig you up,
send your carcass off and into a local university’s MRI machine
to see what kind of little boy you were
and the first place they'll look for signs of hope and help will be in your bones
and then your teeth
and that's why you need to give then a good brush every night,
most nights if you have a busy week.

The boy looked up to the ceiling,
where most look at times like these,
these times being
lower left, a, b, c, d and e,
and through an open mouth asked,

Please can I have a sticker after?